![]() ![]() He offers to drive her to the bus station (cue montage above), but he can’t just LEAVE her at the bus station. Not pictured: his coat-matching gloves, her asymmetric earrings.) She’s got harem pants and an enormous leather cocoon jacket with dyed to match gloves. ![]() Laaaaady! (Can we just look at how ’80s this is? He has two collared shirts, layered, blazer with popped collar, coat with popped collar, and an open scarf. James is from the ’80s he knows how to treat a lady. Now he’s all alone with the young woman he’s saved, who seems reluctant to chat but reluctant to leave. Why, James Spader, of course! Since everyone’s in for an awkward yet weirdly-alluring time when James Spader is your leading man, he is able to deploy an effective Do We Have A Problem, Guys protocol and scare off the twins. However, she’s clearly terrified! Where will she find help? Never have you seen such thematic eyebrow-raising attempted on so small a budget! Never have heroes run up and down so many flights of stairs! Not since Earth Girls are Easy has the ’80s been so, so ’80s! She knows nothing of love he just knows nothing. ![]() What this movie also is: the ’80s-est movie you’ve never heard of that features a beautiful alien who comes to earth seeking freedom, but finds James Spader instead. Anything happens in that five minutes and I’m James Spader. You give me a time and a place, I give you a five minute window. The movie isn’t just that, but at intervals it’s pretty markedly that, what with its car-mechanic hero willing to give up everything to protect a particularly winsome young lady whose love he can never keep, illustrated by montages of driving at night, the best car chase ever committed to film, and everyone’s favorite Pink Neon font. The most recent is Starcrossed, otherwise known as The Movie Nicholas Winding Refn Probably Secretly Saw Before He Made Drive. Thanks to late nights and decisions that seem poor but are in fact awesome, I’ve seen some truly amazing movies. ![]()
0 Comments
Leave a Reply. |
AuthorWrite something about yourself. No need to be fancy, just an overview. ArchivesCategories |